"I'd rather have them not show up, if the idea of a commanding officer with unsavory pastimes is all it takes for them to quiver in their boots. I'm hardly the worst thing they'll face." Jade paused, mentally counting the milliseconds for perfect comedic timing. "I'd like to think I'm in the top ten, though."

Guo Jia had a point, though. The Tartarus usually operated with a skeleton crew because Jade couldn't be bothered to lead, inspire, or otherwise take responsibility for other people. But with increasing reports of undead roaming the provinces closest to the Rift, even the Tartarus had been pulled from its research objectives and put to more military use. Jade wasn't exactly thrilled with the new assignment, but serving in the Imperial Guard was another of his "hobbies." It kept him out of trouble, more or less.

"So, then, what shall we do to increase morale? Start a glee club?"